240+ Laugh Out Loud With These Library Jokes And Puns!

Libraries are sanctuaries of wisdom, but they can also be fountains of laughter! Whether you’re a bibliophile, a casual reader, or just someone who loves a good laugh, these library-themed jokes and puns are sure to bring a smile to your face. 

We’ve compiled a list of the best library jokes and puns, divided into different categories for your reading pleasure. So, let’s dive in and get ready to laugh out loud!

Stacked With Laughter: Our Favorite ‘Library’ Puns & Jokes – Editor’s Picks

• Why did the librarian get kicked off the plane? Because it was overbooked.
• What’s the tallest building in the world? The library, because it has so many stories.
• Why don’t you ever see a library at the beach? Because it has too many shelves.
• Why did the scarecrow become a librarian? Because he was outstanding in his field.
• How do librarians flirt? They ask for your call number.
• What do you call a library that only has books about bread? A loaf-ry.
• Why was the math book sad? Because it had too many problems.

• Why did the librarian bring string to the library? To tie up loose ends.
• What do you call a librarian who knows where everything is? A shelf-absorbed genius.
• Why did the computer go to the library? It needed to read up on new programs.
• What did one book say to another during a fight? “You don’t have a spine!”
• How does a library make sure it’s clean? It has bookworms.
• Why did the book go to the hospital? Because it broke its spine.
• What do you call a library that’s been burned down? An alibi.
• Why was the library so hot? Because it didn’t have enough fans.
• Why did the librarian always carry a red pen? In case she needed to draw blood.
• What do you get if you cross a librarian with a lawyer? All the information you need, but you can’t understand a word of it.
• Why did the book join the police? It wanted to go undercover.
• What did the librarian say to the loud book? “You need to tone it down!”
• Why was the librarian always calm? She had a lot of shelf-control.
• What’s a librarian’s favorite food? Read-ishes.
• Why did the librarian wear glasses? To improve her shelf-esteem.
• What did the librarian say when she lost her voice? “I’m all booked up!”
• Why did the book about mountains get a bad review? It was too rocky.
• How do you organize a space party? You planet in the library!

Laugh Till You’re Dead Zombie Jokes And Puns!

Laugh Out Loud With These Funny ‘Library’ One-Liner Jokes

• I asked the librarian if the library had any books on paranoia. She whispered, “They’re right behind you.”
• I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down!
• Why don’t libraries have clock towers? Because they want to keep good times.
• I told the librarian I lost my place in her book. She said, “You should bookmark it.”
• Why don’t we ever tell secrets in the library? Because it’s full of tell-tale books.
• I was in a library and asked the librarian for a book on turtles. “Hardback?” “Yes, with little heads.”
• Why was the book about history always depressed? It kept dwelling on the past.
• Libraries are good places to go if you feel alone. There’s always someone there.
• What’s a librarian’s favorite type of humor? Shelf-deprecating humor.
• Why do librarians love gardening? Because they love to plant knowledge.
• I asked the librarian for a book on pantomime. She said, “It’s behind you!”
• The library is the tallest building in town. It has the most stories.

• Why was the library so noisy? It was full of plot twists.
• I told the librarian there was a spider in my book. She said, “Take it out; it’s overdue!”
• Why did the librarian stay calm during the crisis? She had all the answers on the shelf.
• Why do librarians hate thieves? They’re booked solid.
• What do you call a library of great minds? A think tank.
• The librarian got promoted. She had great shelf-esteem.
• Why was the librarian great at poker? She knew how to bluff.
• Why did the librarian stay home? She had a novel idea.
• Why are books so cold? They have too many drafts.
• How do librarians check out books? With a sense of humor.
• Why don’t libraries have mirrors? Because they reflect on the past.
• What’s a librarian’s favorite song? “Check It Out.”
• Why did the librarian bring a ladder to work? To reach new heights in her career.

Bookworms: Get Ready To Laugh With These QnA Jokes & Puns About The Library!

• Why did the library book want to get in shape? It had too many “chapters.”
• Why did the librarian become a gardener? Because she wanted to “grow” her own readers.
• What do you call a library full of cats? A catalog.
• Why did the librarian quit her job? She was overbooked.
• How does a librarian wish you a happy birthday? Many happy returns.
• Why are libraries so strict? Because they have to keep their books in order.
• What did the librarian say to the comedian? “You crack me up!”
• Why do librarians make great detectives? They always find the missing pieces.
• What’s the difference between a librarian and a teacher? Librarians know the book’s ending.
• Why was the library always cool? It had too many fans.
• What did the book say to its reader? “Read between the lines.”
• Why did the librarian cross the road? To return her books on the other side.
• Why don’t libraries lend pencils? Because they’re always getting in a jam.
• What do librarians use to catch fish? Bookworms.
• What did the novel do when it saw the library? It booked it!
• Why did the librarian break up with the book? It was too self-absorbed.
• What’s a librarian’s favorite exercise? The book press.
• Why did the library book fail its driving test? It couldn’t stay in its lane.
• What do you call a book club that has been stuck on the same book for years? Church.
• Why did the librarian get a ticket? For speeding through the pages.
• What do you call a librarian with a cold? A sniffle-page.
• Why did the librarian get locked in the library? She lost her page-turner.

• What did the librarian say to the alien? “Take me to your reader.”
• Why are libraries the best places to write? They have the write stuff.
• Why do librarians love the ocean? Because of all the book drops.

Shh! These Dad Jokes About The Library Are Bookishly Hilarious!

• Why don’t libraries play hide and seek? Because good books are always found.
• What did the librarian say to the bookworm? “Stop bugging me!”
• Why was the library’s computer so smart? It had a lot of bytes.
• What do you call a library without books? A novel idea.
• Why was the book about careers sad? It never found its calling.
• Why did the librarian get glasses? To improve her shelf-esteem.
• What do you call a book club that reads the same book every month? A monotony.
• Why are librarians so organized? They have to have good references.
• What’s a librarian’s favorite type of music? Shelf rock.
• Why did the librarian go on vacation? She needed to check out.
• What’s the librarian’s favorite part of the baseball game? The bookends.
• Why did the librarian become a chef? To add some spice to her life.
• How do you get a librarian’s attention? Just whisper.
• Why did the book go to school? To get a little more literate.
• Why did the librarian wear a belt? To keep her pants from falling into the fiction section.
• Why did the librarian keep an extra book in her car? In case she got a flat.
• What did the librarian say to the noisy book? “You need to be more quiet!”
• Why do librarians hate book thieves? Because they’re always getting into trouble.

• Why did the librarian get promoted? She had great references.
• What do you call a librarian who can’t stop talking? A page-turner.
• Why did the book about clocks never sell? It was too time-consuming.
• What did the librarian say when she found a lost book? “You’re overdue!”
• Why don’t libraries need security? Because they have good checks and balances.
• What do you call a library where books are replaced by birds? A tweet-ery.
• Why was the librarian always late? She kept losing her place.

Book Up Some Laughs: Hilarious Library Puns & Jokes For Kids

• Why did the kid bring a ladder to the library? To reach the high shelves!
• What do you call a dinosaur that loves the library? A read-asaurus.
• Why was the library so crowded? Because it was a storybook ending!
• What did the librarian say to the child who loved scary stories? “Don’t read it all at once!”
• Why did the kid get detention in the library? For starting a book fight.
• How did the librarian fix the broken book? With a bookmark!
• Why did the librarian turn off the lights? To read in the dark.
• What’s a librarian’s favorite candy? Book-erscotch.
• Why did the kid bring a blanket to the library? For a cozy read.
• What did the librarian say to the bookworm? “You’re a book-eating machine!”
• Why did the kid bring a pencil to the library? To draw some conclusions.
• What do you call a library full of rabbits? A hop-in library.
• Why did the kid ask for a book on jokes? To have pun at the library!
• What’s a librarian’s favorite fruit? A book-berry.
• Why did the kid bring an umbrella to the library? Because it was a rainy day story.
• What did the librarian say to the noisy class? “You need to tone it down!”
• Why did the kid sit on the book? To reach a higher level.
• What’s a librarian’s favorite sport? Read-ing.
• Why did the book cross the road? To get to the library.
• What did the kid say to the librarian? “Can I check you out?”
• Why did the book go to the party? To have a good read.

• Why did the kid bring a clock to the library? To read timely stories.
• What do you call a librarian’s garden? A book-tanical garden.
• Why did the kid love the library? Because it was a novel place.
• What’s a librarian’s favorite vegetable? Book-choy.

Quietly Hilarious: Funny Quotes About People Who Don’t Use The ‘Shhh’ In Library

• “If you can’t be quiet in the library, you’re in the wrong place!” – Anonymous
• “Silence is golden in the library, so why are you still talking?” – Librarian’s Sign
• “A loud library is like a loud church, it just doesn’t work.” – Book Lover
• “If you have to shout in a library, you’re not reading the right book.” – Bibliophile
• “Libraries are meant for whispers, not for loudspeakers.” – Quiet Advocate
• “Shhh! The books are listening.” – Librarian’s Rule
• “Talking in a library is like singing in a movie theater, inappropriate and distracting.” – Library Regular
• “If you must talk in the library, let your book do the speaking.” – Silent Reader
• “A library without silence is like a concert without music.” – Book Enthusiast
• “Respect the quiet zones, your voice carries more than your thoughts.” – Quiet Seeker
• “Silent pages turn louder than whispers in a quiet library.” – Anonymous
• “The ‘shhh’ in the library isn’t optional, it’s mandatory.” – Librarian’s Motto
• “For the love of books, keep the volume down.” – Library Sign
• “A quiet library is a happy library.” – Reader’s Wisdom
• “Noise in the library? Unthinkable!” – Book Lover
• “Libraries are for reading, not for your social hour.” – Anonymous
• “If you can’t be quiet, go outside.” – Library Rule
• “Silence is a virtue, especially in the library.” – Quiet Advocate
• “Loud voices belong in the playground, not the library.” – Library Enthusiast
• “Shhh! Even the walls have ears.” – Librarian’s Saying
• “Books speak louder than voices in a library.” – Anonymous
• “Whisper if you must, but silence is golden.” – Quiet Reader
• “In a library, your voice is the villain.” – Book Protector
• “Libraries and loud voices are like oil and water, they just don’t mix.” – Anonymous
• “Keep the library peaceful, let your voice rest.” – Silent Scholar

Chemistry Puns, Jokes And One-Liners

Wisdom Is Found In Books, But Laughter Is Found In The Library – Funny Proverbs & Wise Sayings About Libraries!

• “A library in the hand is worth two on the shelf.” – Book Proverb
• “Better a book in the hand than a story left untold.” – Reader’s Wisdom
• “He who laughs last in the library, laughs quietly.” – Wise Librarian
• “Silence is golden in a library, but laughter is the platinum of life.” – Book Lover’s Saying
• “The early reader gets the best books.” – Library Proverb
• “A closed book is a silent teacher.” – Anonymous
• “Books are the quietest and most constant of friends.” – Charles W. Eliot
• “A good book has no ending, just a happy reader.” – Wise Saying
• “The library is a hospital for the mind.” – Anonymous
• “Books are the bees which carry the pollen of thought.” – James Russell Lowell
• “The only thing you absolutely have to know, is the location of the library.” – Albert Einstein
• “A library is not a luxury, but one of the necessities of life.” – Henry Ward Beecher
• “Libraries will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no libraries.” – Anne Herbert
• “In the library, you can find anything, except your lost keys.” – Proverb
• “A book is a dream that you hold in your hand.” – Neil Gaiman
• “Books are uniquely portable magic.” – Stephen King
• “The library is the temple of learning, and learning has liberated more people than all the wars in history.” – Carl T. Rowan
• “A library is a place where you can lose your innocence without losing your virginity.” – Germaine Greer
• “Libraries are the wardrobes of literature.” – George Dyer
• “He who opens a school door, closes a prison.” – Victor Hugo
• “The library is the haven of peace and quiet.” – Anonymous
• “A book is a gift you can open again and again.” – Garrison Keillor
• “In the library, time is the best author.” – Anonymous
• “Reading is to the mind what exercise is to the body.” – Joseph Addison
• “The library is an open door to the world.” – Anonymous

Checking Out Some “Book”Y Jokes: Library Double Entendres Puns

• Why was the library always so well-lit? Because it was full of bright ideas.
• Why did the book join the circus? It wanted to be a spine-tamer.
• What did the romance novel say to the thriller? “You make my heart race!”
• Why did the horror book scream? It saw the bookworm.
• How do you make a library float? With root beer and a good book.
• Why did the book sit in the sun? To get a little tan-gent.
• What’s a librarian’s favorite type of humor? Pun-ishing jokes.
• Why did the dictionary go to the therapist? It had too many definitions.
• Why don’t books trust ladders? They’re always up to something.
• What’s a librarian’s favorite dance? The book-step.
• Why was the library always so quiet? It was booked solid.
• Why did the book go to jail? It was framed.
• How do books stay cool? They sit in the shade.
• Why did the book join the gym? It wanted to improve its spine.
• What’s a book’s favorite dessert? A chapter cake.
• Why did the book enroll in school? To improve its literacy.
• Why was the library always at peace? It had a novel way of solving problems.
• What did the book say to the librarian? “I’m feeling checked out.”
• Why don’t books play hide and seek? Because they always get found.
• How do you catch a bookworm? By its tale.
• What did the non-fiction book say to the fiction book? “You’re full of stories!”
• Why did the librarian get a promotion? She turned over a new leaf.
• What’s a book’s favorite type of clothing? Page turners.
• Why did the librarian start a book club? To share the love of reading.
• Why don’t books make good musicians? They can’t handle the notes.

Lost In The Stacks: Recursive Puns About The Library

• Why did the library book keep checking itself out? It had self-esteem issues.
• What do you call a library full of math books? A problem-solving section.
• Why did the library’s book club never end? Because they were reading a series.
• Why did the librarian love puzzles? She was always looking for the missing piece.
• What’s a librarian’s favorite kind of shoes? Loafers, because they fit perfectly with reading.
• Why did the book get a job? It wanted to make some sense (cents).
• How do you make a book laugh? Just add a few funny pages.
• Why did the library book start meditating? To find inner piece (peace).
• Why are books bad at sports? They can’t handle the pressure.
• What did the librarian say to the anxious book? “Don’t worry, be shelf-confident.”
• Why did the book go on vacation? It needed a break from all the drama.
• What’s a library’s favorite type of joke? A recursive one: “This joke is found in the library.”
• Why did the book go to therapy? It couldn’t handle its cover.
• Why don’t libraries play board games? Because the pieces always get shelved.
• What did the book say when it graduated? “It’s about time!”
• Why are libraries always so tidy? They have a lot of shelf control.
• What do you call a library full of card catalogs? A deck of knowledge.
• Why did the book get an award? It had outstanding issues.
• Why are books always so serious? Because they’re bound by their covers.
• Why did the book go to the art gallery? It wanted to see the pictures.
• What’s a book’s favorite part of the day? Story time.
• Why did the library book get a makeover? It wanted to turn a new page.
• Why don’t books argue? They just let their covers speak for themselves.
• What did the book say to the magazine? “You’ve got so many issues!”

• Why are libraries so calm? Because they’re full of peace (pieces) of knowledge.

Knock, Knock. Who’s There? Dewey. Dewey Who? Dewey Have Any More Library Jokes?

• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Dewey. Dewey who? Dewey have to return the books now?
• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Book. Book who? Book a room, I’ve got a story to tell.
• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Page. Page who? Page me if you find a good book.
• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Read. Read who? Read any good books lately?
• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Author. Author who? Author-ized to tell you a joke!
• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Novel. Novel who? Novel idea, isn’t it?
• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Story. Story who? Story of my life, always knocking.
• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Chapter. Chapter who? Chapter up and move on!
• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Borrow. Borrow who? Borrowed any good books lately?
• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Index. Index who? Index finger points to the library.
• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Title. Title who? Title your next book after this joke.
• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Fiction. Fiction who? Fiction books are my favorite.
• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Volume. Volume who? Volume up on the silence, please.
• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Shelf. Shelf who? Shelf yourself with some good reads.
• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Spine. Spine who? Spine a good tale for me.
• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Genre. Genre who? Genre-ally speaking, I love libraries.
• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Cover. Cover who? Cover your tracks and return the book.
• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Blurb. Blurb who? Blurb me a great review.
• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Index. Index who? Index the best books here.
• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Citation. Citation who? Citation needed for this joke.
• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Loan. Loan who? Loan me a book, will you?
• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Publish. Publish who? Publish this joke, it’s hilarious.
• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Printer. Printer who? Printer out of ink, get a new one.
• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Series. Series who? Series-ly, more books please.
• Knock, knock. Who’s there? Dewey. Dewey who? Dewey decimal system forever!

Conclusion

Libraries are not just places for quiet contemplation and serious study; they are also rich with the potential for humor and laughter. Through these puns, jokes, and witty sayings, we can appreciate the lighter side of our literary sanctuaries.

 Next time you visit your local library, remember these jokes and share a laugh with a librarian or fellow book lover. After all, laughter is the best way to enjoy the vast world of books and knowledge.