80+ Funny Bagel Puns, Jokes And One-Liners

Bagels have been a beloved staple in many cultures for centuries, but did you know they can also be a source of laughter? Whether you enjoy them plain, toasted, or loaded with toppings, there’s something about a bagel that just begs for a pun or a joke. If you’re craving a hearty laugh along with your morning schmear, look no further! We’ve compiled over 80 hilarious bagel puns, jokes, and one-liners to tickle your funny bone and spread some doughy delight.

Funny Bagel Puns

  • Why did the bagel go to school? It wanted to be a little bit smarter.
  • What did the bagel say to the bread? You’re crumb-elievable!
  • How does a bagel greet people? With a hole lot of enthusiasm!
  • Why did the bagel break up with the cream cheese? It just couldn’t handle the spread.
  • What’s a bagel’s favorite type of music? Pop.
  • Why did the bagel join a band? It wanted to make some dough.
  • What did the bagel say to the toaster? You really toast my oats!
  • How do you fix a broken bagel? With dough-ctape.
  • Why did the bagel go to outer space? It wanted to visit the rolling planets.
  • What’s a bagel’s favorite board game? Twister, because it’s all about those twists!
  • Why don’t bagels ever get lost? They always know their way.
  • What did one bagel say to the other in the gym? Let’s get toasted!
  • How do you know if a bagel is a good dancer? It’s got some serious moves.
  • What’s a bagel’s favorite dance move? The twist!
  • Why was the bagel sad? It felt un-loafed.
  • What’s a bagel’s favorite type of comedy? Dry humor.
  • How do bagels stay in shape? They exercise portion control.
  • Why did the bagel go to the doctor? It was feeling a little crumby.
  • What did the bagel say to the bicycle? I want to ride with you!
  • Why did the bagel blush? It saw the cream cheese in its birthday suit.
  • What’s a bagel’s favorite movie genre? Roll-licking comedies.
  • Why don’t bagels ever get in fights? They always try to find a common roll-ution.
  • What did the bagel say to the baseball? You’re looking pretty holesome!
  • How do you make a bagel laugh? Tell it a hole-some joke.
  • Why did the bagel get an award? It was a real dough-light.
  • What’s a bagel’s favorite sport? Roller derby.
  • Why did the bagel go to the beach? It wanted to work on its tan lines.
  • What’s a bagel’s favorite game show? Wheel of Fortune – it loves spins!
  • Why was the bagel so happy? It was on a roll!
  • What’s a bagel’s favorite type of math? Division, because it’s all about the cut.

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Cute Bagel Puns

  • Why was the bagel so popular? It was kneaded by everyone!
  • What did the bagel say to the loaf of bread? You’re the yeast I could do!
  • How does a bagel answer the phone? Gluten-tag!
  • Why did the bagel go to the party? It wanted to be the center of attention.
  • What’s a bagel’s favorite holiday? Dough-nut Day!
  • Why was the bagel so loved? It had a lot of dough-lightful qualities.
  • What did the bagel say to the donut? Let’s be friends with glaze-benefits.
  • How do you make a bagel smile? Give it a little pat.
  • Why was the bagel so trustworthy? It never told a crust-worthy secret.
  • What’s a bagel’s favorite subject in school? Bread-ing.
  • Why did the bagel get an A+? It was a hole-some student.
  • What did the bagel say to the croissant? You’re so flaky!
  • How does a bagel flirt? With a little wheat talk.
  • Why did the bagel go to the doctor? It was feeling a bit crumby.
  • What’s a bagel’s favorite book genre? Roll-ercoaster adventures.
  • Why did the bagel go to the art gallery? It wanted to see some dough-tistic masterpieces.
  • How does a bagel apologize? With a sincere glaze.
  • Why did the bagel bring a ladder to the bakery? It wanted to reach the upper crust.
  • What’s a bagel’s favorite type of weather? Partly cloudy with a chance of sprinkles.
  • Why was the bagel such a good listener? It always gave its ear.
  • What did the bagel say to the pancake? You’re really flat-tering!
  • How does a bagel like its coffee? With a little cream and sugar.
  • Why did the bagel get a promotion? It rose to the occasion.
  • What’s a bagel’s favorite hobby? Roller skating.
  • Why did the bagel go to school early? It didn’t want to be tardy.
  • What did the bagel say to the pretzel? Let’s knot be strangers!
  • How does a bagel cheer up a friend? With a little dough-nation.
  • Why did the bagel go to the beach? It wanted to catch some rays.
  • What’s a bagel’s favorite movie snack? Popcorn – it loves the crunch!
  • Why was the bagel so calm? It had a lot of inner peace.

Read more: Funny Pie Puns , Jokes And One-Liners

Puns About Bagel

  • Why did the bagel get an award? It was raising the bar.
  • What did the bagel say to the donut? You’re twisting my words!
  • How does a bagel feel about roller coasters? It’s on a roll!
  • Why was the bagel so good at baseball? It had a killer swing.
  • What did the bagel say to the tennis ball? Let’s have a match made in heaven!
  • How does a bagel solve a problem? It kneads to think outside the box.
  • Why did the bagel go to the party alone? It wanted to mix and mingle.
  • What did the bagel say to the breadstick? You’re so sticking cute!
  • How does a bagel pay for things? With its dough.
  • Why did the bagel break up with the croissant? It was tired of the flakey behavior.
  • What did the bagel say to the chef? You’re really rolling in success!
  • How does a bagel stay organized? It keeps everything in loaf.
  • Why did the bagel start a business? It wanted to be the toast of the town.
  • What did the bagel say to the clock? You’ve got some dough-mazing hands!
  • How does a bagel flirt with a muffin? With some butter-up lines.
  • Why did the bagel go to the comedy club? It wanted to get a rise out of the audience.
  • What did the bagel say to the loaf of bread? Let’s be crust-mates!
  • How does a bagel win an argument? With a hole lot of convincing evidence.
  • Why did the bagel start a band? It wanted to be a rolling stone.
  • What did the bagel say to the pizza? Let’s have a slice of life together.
  • How does a bagel throw a party? With a hole lot of fun!
  • Why did the bagel get a new job? It wanted to expand its horizons.
  • What did the bagel say to the refrigerator? Stop stealing my cool!
  • How does a bagel feel about Mondays? It’s always dough-termined to rise.
  • Why did the bagel go to the therapist? It had a lot of emotional baggage.
  • What did the bagel say to the donut? You’re the glaze to my dough!
  • How does a bagel make friends? It’s really friendly and hole-some.
  • Why did the bagel start a blog? It had a lot of bread to share.
  • What did the bagel say to the hamburger bun? You’re bun-believable!
  • How does a bagel feel about puns? It thinks they’re dough-lightful!
  • Bagel: Why did the bagel go to school? It wanted to be a little bit smarter.
  • Cream Cheese: Why did the bagel break up with the cream cheese? It just couldn’t handle the spread.

Conclusion

In conclusion, bagels are not only delicious but also surprisingly funny! With over 80 puns, jokes, and one-liners, it’s clear that bagels have a unique charm that can bring a smile to anyone’s face. Whether you prefer your bagel plain or loaded with toppings, there’s no denying the doughy delight that comes with a good laugh. From witty wordplay to playful observations, these bagel puns and jokes add an extra layer of enjoyment to our favorite breakfast staple. So next time you’re enjoying a bagel with your morning coffee or sharing a laugh with friends, remember the doughy humor that’s just waiting to be enjoyed. After all, a good bagel is not just food for the body, but also food for the soul!

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