250+Laugh Out Loud Family-Friendly Jokes And Puns!

Humor is an essential part of family life. It brings everyone closer and creates unforgettable memories. In this article, we’ve compiled a collection of 250+ family-friendly jokes and puns that will have everyone in your household laughing out loud.

From dad jokes to one-liners, from puns to knock-knock jokes, we’ve got something for everyone. So, gather your family and get ready to share some laughs!

Table of Contents

Bringing The Funny To ‘Family’ Gatherings: Our Editor’s Top Puns & Jokes Picks

Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta!
Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese!
Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon? Because she will let it go.
Why was the math book sad? It had too many problems.
What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.
Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired!
How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it!
What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh.

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh.

Why was the computer cold? It left its Windows open.
Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They’d crack each other up.
What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire? Frostbite.
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing.
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one.
What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop.
Why did the banana go to the doctor? It wasn’t peeling well.
What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse? Kitty Perry.
How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together.
Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Because it felt crummy.
Why are ghosts bad liars? Because they are too transparent.
Why did the fisherman put peanut butter into the sea? To go with the jellyfish.
How do you catch a squirrel? Climb a tree and act like a nut.
Why don’t some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don’t work out.
Why did the chicken join a band? Because it had the drumsticks!

Laugh Out Loud With These Hilarious ‘Funny Family’ One-Liner Jokes

I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
I threw a boomerang a few years ago. I now live in constant fear.
Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
What did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just waved.
Why do cows have hooves instead of feet? Because they lactose.
How do you organize a space party? You planet.
Why did the scarecrow become a successful neurosurgeon? He was outstanding in his field.
I would avoid the sushi if I was you. It’s a little fishy.
Want to hear a joke about construction? I’m still working on it.
Why don’t you ever see elephants hiding in trees? Because they’re so good at it.
How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together.
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.
Did you hear about the kidnapping at the playground? They woke up.
Why do seagulls fly over the ocean? Because if they flew over the bay, they’d be bagels.
How does a scientist freshen her breath? With experi-mints.
Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged.
How do trees access the internet? They log on.

How do trees access the internet? They log on

Why was the math book sad? It had too many problems.
What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta.
Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl using the bathroom? Because the “P” is silent.
How do you catch a squirrel? Climb a tree and act like a nut.
Why did the belt go to jail? It held up a pair of pants.
Why don’t some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don’t work out.
I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.
I couldn’t figure out how to put my seatbelt on, then it clicked.

Get Ready To ROFL With These Hilarious QnA Jokes & Puns About Family!

Why don’t you play hide and seek with mountains? Because they always peak!
What kind of tree fits in your hand? A palm tree!
Why did the stadium get hot after the game? All of the fans left.
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman.
How do you organize a space party? You planet.
Why don’t oysters donate to charity? Because they are shellfish.
What did one plate say to the other plate? Lunch is on me.
Why did the kid cross the playground? To get to the other slide.
What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain.
Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon? Because she will let it go.
What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.
Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired!
How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it!
Why did the scarecrow become a successful neurosurgeon? He was outstanding in his field.
Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese!
Why was the computer cold? It left its Windows open.
Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They’d crack each other up.
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing.
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one.
What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop.

What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop..

Why did the banana go to the doctor? It wasn’t peeling well.
What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse? Kitty Perry.
How do you catch a squirrel? Climb a tree and act like a nut.
Why don’t some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don’t work out.

Dad Jokes About ‘Family’: Making Memories And Laughing Till It Hurts

What’s brown and sticky? A stick.
Why don’t some fish play piano? Because you can’t tuna fish.
How do you catch a unique rabbit? Unique up on it.
Why don’t crabs give to charity? Because they’re shellfish.
What did the grape do when it got stepped on? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
Why don’t seagulls fly over the bay? Because then they’d be bagels.
Why do cows wear bells? Because their horns don’t work.
How do you fix a broken tuba? With a tuba glue.
What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain.
How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together.
Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta!
Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese!
Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They’d crack each other up.
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing.
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one.
What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop.
Why did the banana go to the doctor? It wasn’t peeling well.
What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse? Kitty Perry.
How do you catch a squirrel? Climb a tree and act like a nut.
Why don’t some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don’t work out.
What did the big flower say to the little flower? Hey, bud!
Why are ghosts bad at lying? Because they are too transparent.
What’s the best way to watch a fly-fishing tournament? Live stream.

August With These Hilarious Jokes And Pu ns!

Funny And Fabulous: Family Puns & Jokes For Kids To Crack Up The Whole Clan!

Why did the golfer bring extra pants? In case he got a hole in one.
What’s a skeleton’s least favorite room in the house? The living room.
Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
How do you catch a unique rabbit? Unique up on it.
Why don’t you ever see elephants hiding in trees? Because they’re so good at it.
What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh.
Why did the chicken join a band? Because it had the drumsticks.
Why did the cow cross the road? To get to the udder side.
What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer.
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? Supplies!
Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.
How does a scientist freshen her breath? With experi-mints.
Why was the computer cold? It left its Windows open.
Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They’d crack each other up.
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing.
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one.
What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop.
Why did the banana go to the doctor? It wasn’t peeling well.
What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.
How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together.
What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain.

What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain.

Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired.
How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it!
What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese!

Bringing The Belly Laughs: Hilarious And Heartwarming Funny Quotes About Family

“Family is not an important thing. It’s everything.” – Michael J. Fox
“Laughter is an instant vacation.” – Milton Berle
“Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.” – George Burns
“The advantage of growing up with siblings is that you become very good at fractions.” – Robert Brault
“Families are like fudge – mostly sweet, with a few nuts.” – Anonymous
“The family is one of nature’s masterpieces.” – George Santayana
“Having a family is like having a bowling alley installed in your brain.” – Martin Mull
“A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold.” – Ogden Nash
“A family’s love is the best form of healing.” – Anonymous
“Family: where life begins and love never ends.” – Anonymous
“Family is like music, some high notes, some low notes, but always a beautiful song.” – Anonymous
“The best thing about having a sister was that I always had a friend.” – Cali Rae Turner
“In time of test, family is best.” – Burmese Proverb
“The only rock I know that stays steady, the only institution I know that works, is the family.” – Lee Iacocca
“Call it a clan, call it a network, call it a , call it a family. Whatever you call it, whoever you are, you need one.” – Jane Howard
“My family is my life, and everything else comes second as far as what’s important to me.” – Michael Imperioli
“Family means no one gets left behind or forgotten.” – David Ogden Stiers
“In family life, love is the oil that eases friction, the cement that binds closer together, and the music that brings harmony.” – Friedrich Nietzsche
“What can you do to promote world peace? Go home and love your family.” – Mother Teresa
“You don’t choose your family. They are God’s gift to you, as you are to them.” – Desmond Tutu
“Family is the most important thing in the world.” – Princess Diana
“The love of a family is life’s greatest blessing.” – Anonymous
“Families are the compass that guides us. They are the inspiration to reach great heights, and our comfort when we occasionally falter.” – Brad Henry
“A happy family is but an earlier heaven.” – George Bernard Shaw
“Other things may change us, but we start and end with the family.” – Anthony Brandt

Laughter Is The Glue That Holds A ‘Family’ Together – Funny Proverbs & Wise Sayings About ‘Family’

“Blood is thicker than water, but laughter is the glue.”
“A family that laughs together, stays together.”
“Home is where the humor is.”
“A joyful family is the best tonic.”
“Family: the gift that lasts forever.”
“Laughter is brightest in the place where the food is.” – Irish Proverb
“The family that plays together, stays together.”
“A family in harmony will prosper in everything.”
“One of the oldest human needs is having someone to wonder where you are when you don’t come home at night.” – Margaret Mead
“Laughter is the sun that drives winter from the human face.” – Victor Hugo
“If you cannot get rid of the family skeleton, you may as well make it dance.” – George Bernard Shaw
“A family’s laughter is the greatest sound in the world.”
“The laughter of a child is the light of a house.”
“Family: where laughter never ends.”
“Laughter and love are the secrets of a happy family.”
“The family that laughs together lasts together.”
“A family with laughter is a family with love.”
“Laughter is timeless, imagination has no age, and dreams are forever.” – Walt Disney
“Family: a little bit of shocking, a little bit of loud, and a whole lot of love.”
“A house full of laughter is a house full of love.”
“Family is the heart of a home, and laughter is its heartbeat.”
“In every conceivable manner, the family is the link to our past, bridge to our future.” – Alex Haley
“Where there is family, there is love.”
“A family’s laughter is like music to the soul.”
“The love in our family flows strong and deep, leaving us memories to treasure and keep.”

Laugh it off Friends Jokes & Puns for a Good Tim e

Family Fun: Double The Entendres, Twice The Puns

What’s the best way to watch a fly-fishing tournament? Live stream.
What do you get if you cross a snowman and a dog? Frostbite.
What do you call a funny mountain? Hill-arious.
Why was the math book sad? It had too many problems.
Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They’d crack each other up.
Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman.
Why did the scarecrow become a neurosurgeon? He was outstanding in his field.
Why don’t you ever see elephants hiding in trees? Because they’re so good at it.
What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain.
How do you organize a space party? You planet.
Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta!
Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
Why don’t some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don’t work out.
How do you catch a squirrel? Climb a tree and act like a nut.
Why don’t you play hide and seek with mountains? Because they always peak.
What kind of tree fits in your hand? Apalm tree!
Why did the stadium get hot after the game? All of the fans left.
What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing.
What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese!
How does a scientist freshen her breath? With experi-mints.
What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh.
Why don’t you ever see elephants hiding in trees? Because they’re so good at it.

Family: The Branches Of Our Hilarious Recursive Puns Tree

Why did the tree go to the dentist? To get a root canal.
Why don’t trees like riddles? They get stumped.
What did the big tree say to the little tree? Leaf me alone!
How do trees access the internet? They log in.
Why was the tree always late? It couldn’t stop branching out.
Why did the tree get a job? To branch out.
What did the tree wear to the pool party? Swimming trunks.
Why did the tree bring a suitcase? Because it was going to a branch office.
What do you get when you cross a tree with an iPad? A pine-apple.
Why did the tree go to school? To improve its roots.
What do you call a funny tree? A comedi-tree.
Why did the tree get in trouble? It was caught rooting around.
What did the tree say to the wind? Leaf me alone!
How does a tree get ready for a date? It spruces up.
Why did the tree take a nap? To get some shade.
Why did the tree feel lonely? It was pining for attention.
How do you catch a unique tree? Unique up on it.
What type of tree fits in your hand? A palm tree.
What did the tree do when the bank closed? It started its own branch.
Why don’t trees like computers? They get logged out.
What did the tree say to the lumberjack? I’m falling for you!
Why did the tree bring sunscreen? To protect its bark.
What kind of tree can you hold in your hand? A palm tree.
Why did the tree stay indoors? It didn’t want to get chopped.
Why do trees hate tests? They always get stumped.

Family Fun: Hilarious Knock-Knock Jokes To Keep Everyone Laughing!

Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Lettuce.
Lettuce who?
Lettuce in, it’s freezing out here!
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Tank.
Tank who?
You’re welcome.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Canoe.
Canoe who?
Canoe help me with my homework?
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Harry.
Harry who?
Harry up and answer the door!
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Boo.
Boo who?
Don’t cry, it’s just a joke!
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Olive.
Olive who?
Olive you and I miss you!
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Honeydew.
Honeydew who?
Honeydew you want to go out tonight?
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Lettuce.
Lettuce who?
Lettuce in, it’s raining!
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Snow.
Snow who?
Snow use, the joke is over.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Atch.
Atch who?
Bless you!
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Annie.
Annie who?
Annie way you can let me in?
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Howard.
Howard who?
Howard you like to be outside in the rain?
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Ice cream.
Ice cream who?
Ice cream every time I see a ghost!
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Ben.
Ben who?
Ben knocking so long, let me in!
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Yah.
Yah who?
No, thanks, I prefer Google.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Figs.
Figs who?
Figs the doorbell, it’s broken!
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Dishes.
Dishes who?
Dishes the police, open up!
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Cows go.
Cows go who?
No, cows go moo!
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Orange.
Orange who?
Orange you glad I didn’t say banana?
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Doughnut.
Doughnut who?
Doughnut forget to let me in!
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Broken pencil.
Broken pencil who?
Never mind, it’s pointless.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Butter.
Butter who?
Butter let me in or I’ll freeze!
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Olive.
Olive who?
Olive you and miss you!
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Harry.
Harry who?
Harry up and open the door!
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Icy.
Icy who?
Icy you through the window!

Conclusion

Laughter is a universal language that brings families closer together. Whether it’s through a clever pun, a funny one-liner, or a classic knock-knock joke, humor can brighten any day and create lasting memories.

Here are the top 250+ jokes and puns from our collection that are sure to make your family laugh out loud:

Sarah Jacobs

Hi there! I’m Sarah Jacobs a writer who loves sprinkling humor into people’s lives with puns. Through my words, I aim to bring smiles and laughter to those who read them.